Woman uses baby stroller to shoplift a "personal massager."


Straight out of the Bibble dribble belt, we have a story of a woman who used a baby stroller in an attempt to steal a vibrator from a "Spencer's Gifts" store. Misty Ann Lee, of South Carolina, picked up the vibrator and slid it behind the child in the baby stroller, and proceeded to leave the store. The manager confronted her, but Lee had no idea what the manager was talking about. The vibrator was retrieved by the manager. The woman was taken into custody and charged with shoplifting.

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I spent 6 years of my life as a whore to the retail gods. I've seen people use all kinds of methods to steal from stores. I've seen people put things in areas that I never thought existed. I've also seen people who were brazen enough to lift items in front of our face and run (yes they were caught)! People are relentless. And these are desperate times.

Stealing a vibrator from one of the most scandalous and most popular mall stores is a big no-no. Yes, we all get horny. Yes, we all need to get off. Yes, sex toys are expensive. However, she could have saved herself time, money, and embarrassment by just improvising. Or, she could just take on a lover.

I need to mention the fact that using a child as a partner in crime was just a terrible move. Did this woman get up in the morning and think, "Hmm, I think I'm going to use an innocent child to help me shoplift a vibrator because, damn I'm horny." Is she on some fucking drugs? She needs to have a risk of injury to a minor charge on top of the shoplifting charge. Who knows how this impacted that young child.

Anyways, here is what we have learned from this story:
- Spencer's still sells vibrators, or "personal massagers."
- You can be named Misty and not be a stripper or porn star.
- Police totally forgot to charge Misty with a risk of injury to a minor charge.
- Sex toys actually exist in the south. 
- We never found out what happened to the vibrator.

[photo credit: goldstaradvisors.com]

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