Blurbal Perspective

photo credit: Gawker via YouTube We all know how much Monday's f*cking suck, so I decided to post the following video. I randomly found this video while reading Gawker stories.   So, sit back, relax, and let the cuteness take over.

photo credit: Gawker This week in odd news: A man, who goes by the name of "Farm Daddy," decided to get rather cozy with a statue he thought was the Lincoln Memorial. The act was photographed and shared on Twitter. It shows Farm Daddy in his birthday suit, face-humping the statue. The guy was classy enough to keep his socks on, however. Reasons as to why the guy decided to get oral from a marble statue are not known. My only thought is that there weren't any hookers in the general vicinity to face-hump. Note: It was later determined that the dude face-humped Alexander Graham Bell's statue (bad call on his part). I wonder if he was screaming out Lincoln's name while getting pleasured by the marble version of the phone inventor.

photo credit: hypable It has been quite a week for Jeremy Clarkson and the BBC. After the many attempts that the masses have undertaken to have Jeremy Clarkson reinstated, the efforts have apparently failed. Jeremy Clarkson was suspended when he had gotten into an altercation with Top Gear producer Oisin Tymon. Airings of the show were also suspended pending an investigation. Clarkson is no stranger to controversy. Over the past several years, he has racked up quite a resume of pissing people off. Between homophobic, sexist, anti-environmental, and racist remarks, he has pretty much offended people from all over the world. (you can read about his crimes against humanity here ) News of his suspension, and subsequent firing, has sparked enormous outrage. After Clarkson was suspended, a petition to have him reinstated went viral. Millions of people signed the petition. Even The Stig drove a bad ass tank to the BBC headquarters in protest of the suspension. Piers Morgan, a once m

photo credit: tomcruisecrazy Remember in the 2000s when TomKat was a thing? Tom Cruise jumped on Oprah's couch, like a batsh*t crazy f*cktard, declaring his undying love for Katie Holmes. Katie Holmes would coo about Tom Cruise and how lucky she was to find her true love. They married, had a daughter, and then they divorced. Of course, we all know that Tom Cruise had sucked Katie Holmes into his tangled cult of Scientology. We had to endure some rather disturbing photos of Katie Holmes being all submissive and defeated. Some years later, the clouds parted, and Katie Holmes once again felt the sunshine of common sense caress her face. She saw the error in her ways, and dropped Tom Cruise like a bad habit. Fast foward to 2015. It appears that Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes never speak to one another. When it comes to co-parenting their 9 year old, they utilize an intermediate. Some have wondered if the Scientology "church" does not allow Tom Cruise to speak to

photo credit: The Raw Story via TLC Just when you thought that the Duggars could not get any weirder, here comes the kissing lesson. On a recent episode of "19 Kids and Counting," Jim Bob and Michelle counsel Jessa and Ben on communication in a marriage. Jim Bob:" Both of you'll like the physical relationship, but the guy, that'll be kinda the main focus. But, for a woman, communicating is the most important thing." Then, the counseling session segwayed into a kissing lesson. Jim Bob: "Let me show y'all the best way to kiss, here. If you kiss straight on, your noses hit together.So you have to turn, she turns one way and I turn the other." Jessa coos at her parents kissing one another, saying: "You guys are so cute." Excuse me for a moment....    My Two Cents:  I had my first real kiss when I was 15. It was with a guy I really liked, who liked me back (which was unheard of in my frizzy hair, morbidly obes

photo credit: promicabana Performer/Walking Punch Line/Canadian embarrassment, Justin Bieber will be taking the hot seat in a highly anticipated Roast on Comedy Central. Kevin Hart, along with a celebrity panel, will be tearing the 21 year old a new one on March 30. No subject will be left untouched. From his legal troubles, to his pre-pubescent fans, to his rollercoaster relationship with Selena Gomez, this celebrity panel will be hitting below the belt. Here is a sneak preview of what is to come on Comedy Central's Roast of Justin Bieber: "You are the King Joffrey of Pop."– Jeffrey Ross "A lot of people are upset that Justin hasn't won a Grammy. There is Martha Stewart. She can be your grammy." – Jeff Ross "Justin as a father of six you have to straighten up, son. Last year, you were ranked the fifth most-hated person of all time. Kim Jong-Un didn't rank that low. And he uses your music to torture people." – Shaquille O'Ne

photo credit: Gawker Last month, a man in Canada escaped police by detouring through the Guilford Town Centre Mall in Surrey British Columbia, Canada. He was initially chased by police for reckless driving. He then drove into the mall and down an escalator. Video of the event was recently leaked online. Luckily, no one was injured. Unfortunately for police, he got away. The suspect is a white male, 40ish. If you see this man, contact authorities (or shake his hand for his sick riding skills...I don't know).   My Two Cents: You can't get more hardcore than going all Michael Carrington ("Grease 2" reference) through a mall in order to evade police.

                                                                 photo credit: Huff Post A lot of us have done some pretty stupid things when challenged. I remember back in the day at summer camp, I was once dared to take my clothes off and run around the camp grounds at night. I accepted the challenge and ran around without a stitch of clothes on. I did stop a few times to watch shooting stars, but I digress. There was another time when I was dared to lick my finger and then stick it in this dudes hairy belly button. Reluctantly, I did it, and then violently puked. A woman in Florida (surprise, surprise) told police that she was dared to spend time at Dunkin Donuts completely naked. So, in order to impress the individuals that dared her, Shakara Martin took off her clothes, and sat outside of the donut and coffee chain. An employee of Dunkin Donuts called police after several customers made complaints about Martin's birthday suit. Witnesses did offer Martin clothes, but she

                                                                    photo credit: Jezebel Ever been so pissed off at people, and the rest of the world, that you furiously dropped your britches and took massive dookies all over town? Do you do it for fun? Well, if you've answered 'Yes' to any of those questions (you sick b*stard), then your 'Mr. Right' is waiting for you in Akron, Ohio. Over the past 3 years, a man in Ohio has been leaving his calling card all over town. Police say that they can narrow 19 incidents of dookie droppings to the same man. His favorite place to let one rip happens to be in the Castle Homes neighborhood of Akron. A resident called police after they found his sh*tty calling card on their car. They state that it has happened 8 other times since last fall. A photo shared on Facebook shows the man, with his pants to his ankles, just letting one rip (and he isn't even playing "Family Guy: The Quest For Stuff" while pooping

photo credit: Shauna Silva (Me) *Youtube sensation Laci Green has joined forces with the ladies of Youtube and asked people to write down advice that they would give to their younger self. So, the following is a letter of advice that I would give to my younger self (if such a thing were possible).* Dear younger self, I know things suck right now. In your young life, you have dealt with abuse of all kinds. You have dealt with mental illness and self-injury. You have also dealt with being bullied. I know it is hard to believe now, but you will survive. I'm not saying that things will get less difficult as you get older, but I am telling you that you need to hang in there and take things day by day. If that is too much to handle, take life minute by minute. Also, not everyone is out to destroy you. The friends you have right now will be your friends later on in life. People like Liz, Alexis, Paul, Desiree, and Yvonne will be in your life, and will be great encouragers. Understa

photo credit: The Advocate Monday night, history was made. For the first time ever, an influential TV show portrayed something that many GLBTQ teens experience: first kisses. We are all used to seeing first kisses between teenage boys and girls, but never has a show portrayed a first kiss between two 13 year old male characters before. Jude and Connor's relationship has grown over the past 3 seasons. We watched Jude (Hayden Byerly) and Connor (Gavin MacIntosh) bond over blue nail polish, and grow closer in their feelings for each other. Unfortunately, our world is still not okay with teenagers questioning their sexuality. Connor's father, who has a distaste for the gay community, has influenced his son to believe that being gay is wrong. Jude, on the other hand, while he is still questioning who he is, he isn't ashamed of what he feels. Connor tries to please his dad by going out with girls, but deep down, he is thinking about Jude. On Monday night's episode, C