That dreadful biological clock...and why people need to shut up about it.

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photo credit: womensforum

Once a woman enters her late twenties and then her 30s, people around you begin to talk about babies. They wonder why you haven't had a child. They wonder why you aren't married. They wonder if you're just asking to have a child with "defects (due to holding off motherhood until later in life)."
Well, I just want to send out a big "fuck you" to those who can't mind their own business. Speaking as a woman approaching her mid-30s, I'm sick of hearing folks tell me that, in a few years, it will be too late. Has anyone ever heard of waiting until you're ready? Yes, my biological clock has been ticking, and it's annoying as hell. I just want to be ready for motherhood, and, right now, I'm not ready.

See, I was born out-of-wedlock (which people like to blame on me because they're right-wing assholes), and since my adolescence, I've vowed to not have babies outside of marriage.
When I tell people this, they say: "What if you DON'T get married?" I tell them that I will cross that bridge when I come to it. Or, maybe I will become a cat lady. Hey, maybe I can't even HAVE kids (I have Celiac disease, which could put me at risk for infertility).

I've only had one serious relationship in my life, and it's the one I'm in right now. Will this head toward marriage? Maybe and I hope so. I don't think about the future because there is too much shit going on right now. The reason why I don't have a record of serious relationships is because I was verbally abused by guys I dated in my 20s. Boys weren't even interested in me when I was a teenager, so I was a late bloomer. Plus, I was battling a lot of inner demons. Why would I bring a child into my screwed up world?
I want to be financially, mentally, emotionally, physically, and spiritually stable when I bring a child into this world. I want to be married. Hell, I want to be all of the above before I even get married. You can't have a strong marriage if you aren't all around stable, and I plan on getting married only once.
Since my back injury, my boyfriend has been helping me with cooking meals, cleaning, and doing laundry. I'm slowly recovering from the major surgery I had back in June (and I'm doing more by myself). Unfortunately, I still haven't been cleared to find work outside the home). IF my boyfriend and I move on to the next level in our relationship, I want to be able to take control of everything if, God forbid, something happens to him.

Anyways, I digress. Women in their 30s KNOW the risks of having children later in life. We don't need to have it relayed to us time and time again. We don't want to be rushed because time is not on our side. For fucks sake, let us get our shit together before we bring a child into this world.

Ladies, if you are in the same position as I am, hearing that biological clock ticking away and people reminding us about how old we are, tune that shit out!
Make a list of the reasons why you are waiting. When you are feeling rushed, look at that list and tell yourself that after you accomplish everything on that list, you will be one hell of a mother-to-be. There are a lot of children in this world who don't have parents and are being raised in deplorable conditions. Be among the few who raise a child in a stable environment. Give your child a chance. The only way to do that is to give yourself a chance and make sure you have your shit together. Your future child will thank you.

That is all. I'm done ranting, LOL! Feel free to comment below!

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