Blurbal Perspective

photo credit: billboard I'm sure you all have seen the photos of Kim K's oiled up rump circulating the internet. Well, it looks like her rump wasn't the only thing she was showing. In " Paper " Magazine's newest issue, Kim K strips down to nothing but classy pearls and a smile. The photos start with her in a long and elegant black dress. Then, it becomes naughty time ! She takes off the dress, dropping it lower and lower, exposing all for the world to see. We all know that she is well-proportioned. She has a curvy figure and a full chest piece. Millions of women around the world would kill for her body. Shit, I wish I had that kind of body. Sadly, I was blessed with a hobbit style body, large feet, and a partially bionic spine (Yes, I'm a freak of nature, but I still have a killer smile and amazing wit). Maybe people have gone on social media body-shaming her, calling her a whore, slut, cunt, etc. While I do not like Kim Kardashian or anything he...

photo credit: dailyvideostv Everybody panic! Monster Energy drinks are satanic! A "respected" religious lady claims that Satan is hiding between the L-carnitine and Pyridoxine Hydrochloride in Monster beverages. She points out how the M on the Monster cans look like the Hebrew number 6. With 3 sixes, that is the "sign of the beast," according to her. Anyone who knows anything about the Hebrew language knows that 666 isn't written like that. Of course, logic went WAYY over this woman's head and is in another galaxy far, far away. (My grandmother went through a Jewish phase and taught me Hebrew when I was a wee lass). Also, the woman says that the cross inside the "o" is satanic. Oh, and the BFC on the side of the can is "seriously bad" (as it means "big fucking cans"). The woman goes on to say that Monster's slogan, "Unleash the Beast" is a Satan reference. Ahh, conspiracy theories...you gotta love them! Y...

photo credit: socialkidspot There is no better feeling than sitting down with a hot coffee first thing in the morning. After all, coffee is the only elixir that makes one able to tolerate other people throughout the day (I know, for me, I cannot even deal with people until I've had my 8oz of the good shit-COFFEE!). Coffee does, however, have its evil side. When in the hands of stupid people, coffee can ruin your day. A woman from Victorville , California was allegedly burned by her McDonalds coffee. Selena Edwards claims the coffee was way too hot. Not only that, she states the lid came loose and the hot coffee poured all over her hands, giving her second degree burns. Edwards was so pissed off at McDonalds for her fuck up, that she took pictures of these "burns" and filed a lawsuit against the fast food giant. Her attempt at sucking the money teet of McDonalds failed, and miserably at that. She is now facing 21 counts of workers' and insurance compensatio...

photo credit: Advocate Last week, a story broke that semen from sodomites are in your Starbucks beverage. The Inquisitr originally broke the news that semen was supposedly found in lattes and the FDA was investigating the claim. Harlem-based pastor, James David Manning, believes that the semen found at Starbucks is from sodomites. In a recent video, Manning said that sodomites frequent Starbucks and a lot of bodily fluids are exchanged there. Starbucks takes semen specimens from the customers, and blends it into the lattes, giving us a euphoric feeling as we drink it. He says that the semen flavors the coffee. Readers, I don't even know where to begin with this one. Of course, homophobia runs rampant in this story, which isn't surprising, given who is talking in the video. The guy is well-known for his homophobic slander. Manning once said that gay people are to blame for bringing ebola to NYC. Hmm, last I checked, the reason why ebola was found in NYC was because som...